Mike Capuzzi: Welcome back to another episode of The Author Factor Podcast. My guest today is Philip Blackett, who is an author, consultant, and entrepreneur who previously worked for FedEx, Goldman Sachs, bank of America, and Chick fil A. Philip has a Master of Divinity degree from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and an MBA from Harvard Business School. Very impressive. Earlier this year, Philip published the book disagree without disrespect, how to respectfully debate with those who think, believe, and vote differently from you. Philip, welcome to the show.

Philip Blackett: Thank you so much, Mike. Happy to be here with you.

Mike Capuzzi: So, could there be any more timeliness for this book? Like, is this, is there, like, is there more of a sweet spot for this book than today?

Philip Blackett: I mean. I mean, outside of writing on artificial intelligence, I think this is definitely a topic that many people are facing with one way or the other.

Mike Capuzzi: Yeah, that's actually a really good point, too, but, yes, but AI a lot of folks, it's still not, you know, it's not affecting my mom, for example. But this topic here. So, you know, very impressive background that you had. Why don't you share a little bit more, Philip, about your background? Because it is pretty diverse. You've got, you know, lots of different things you've done and are doing and then bring us up to today what you're doing today to serve others.

Philip Blackett: Yeah. So I think it's always interesting to answer that question and take nearly 40 years of lived experience and condense it to preferably one or two minutes.

Mike Capuzzi: Yeah, that's all. That's it.

Philip Blackett: What I would say is this, you know, for me, you know, born and raised in the south in Memphis, Tennessee, that makes me a lover of all things, you know, barbecue, sweet tea, chick fil A. Related, I went to school in North Carolina, majored in political science and economics, later went up to New York City, worked on Wall street for a little bit, worked in corporate America, done some entrepreneurial things, went back to school, as you mentioned, for business and for theology. Met my wife. I got two twin daughters. They just started second grade yesterday. And, yeah, I think at this point, I literally turned 40 in about three months on Thanksgiving. And so it's always fun when it's on Thanksgiving, but I think part of it is you start this inventory of thinking to yourself, okay, most people have, like, a midlife crisis around this time. I'm trying to do the opposite and really take note of what's transpired up to this point and think to yourself, okay, what do I want, God willing, the second half of my life to be like? And I think.

Philip Blackett: To answer the second part of your question, Mike, I think it's more so thinking in terms of I don't want to be 70 years old, where I start trying to relay wisdom to people, particularly the only ones who will listen to me at that point will probably be my grandkids, as opposed to saying, hey, here's what's helpful for me, and not only share that with peers, but also the next generation. And oftentimes, I think a great way to do that is put your thoughts on paper, which in this case, one of the books I wrote was really helping myself initially try to figure out a how do I navigate disagreements within my own loved ones and family and relationships in that part? But then when I did that and I came up with that framework, I realized this actually can be helpful for other people. So let me put this in a format that a lot of people can gain access to, and one of the best formats you can possibly put it in is in a book, Brian, and.

Mike Capuzzi: This is not your first book, correct?

Philip Blackett: No, this is one of seven I've done.

Mike Capuzzi: But this is your most recent book, is that correct?

Philip Blackett: One of them, yes. Yeah. Because I kind of batched some books together, and we all. I released them all around the same time in February.

Mike Capuzzi: All right, so just out of curiosity, before we focus on disagree without disrespect, the other books, Philip, what do they cover? Can you just give me a little idea?

Philip Blackett: Yep. So got a couple of them that cover artificial intelligence, one that covers faith and politics, another one covers politics, and then another one covers political, I guess, political ideology. So definitely, like, including all three school experiences as far as, like, political science, economics, business, theology. You got books that cover all those? To some degree.

Mike Capuzzi: So are you. Are you a full time writer or what? So what are you doing today? Are you. So you've got. Tell me, like, do you have clients today and how. What are you doing to serve them?

Philip Blackett: Yeah, so I have clients small business wise, that I'm helping with regards to utilizing artificial intelligence to help them grow. The other part is with regards to disagree without disrespect, book in particular, doing a lot to not only just promote and sell that book, but also try to figure out what's the best way for me to be able to help out businesses, organizations, nonprofits, relationships in particular, how to help navigate these type of disagreements that are inevitable and they'll exist whether it's an election year or not. And so I think that one, for me, is what I'm really excited about, because I think that book in particular, I feel like has the best chance of being like a perennial every year sort of need to help people to some shape or fashion.

Mike Capuzzi: Do you believe the book disagree without disrespect? Obviously, in 2024, it is a like said earlier, it's like, could you have a better time to have this book just put in your opinion? And I know you're only 40, but would this have been a book, Philip, that, you know, 1520 years ago you think would have still been as valuable, you know, in your opinion, or is it today? Is today a different time where a book like this is really important?

Philip Blackett: So I think on both ends, I would say yes to a certain degree. The reason why I say that is because I think 1520 years ago it was different because we didn't have social media to the standpoint we have it now. We also, 1520 years ago, didn't have 500 cable tv channels on where we can get our information or news from 20, 1520 years ago, we didn't have a plethora of YouTube channels, podcasts, newsletters, all these different things as well. So it's so fragmented where people get their information. So you have to navigate all that. But then, more importantly, back then, you also have more examples of people that had solid friendships and relationships with those that clearly saw certain issues or topics differently, where it's not a enigma now to see two people that look different, but more importantly see the same issue drastically different from one another. And yet, and still they can talk nice with one another, they can enjoy a burger or a beer with one another, and they can actually hang out together over the holidays or on the weekend and that sort and be fine being seen publicly together. And so nowadays, that's definitely seemingly like not the case.

Philip Blackett: Almost seems like it's treason. But the problem is you have a group of people that just were not exposed to these type of examples that I saw 1520 years ago growing up. And so I think that the book is helpful back then because I do believe being able to disagree without disrespect is a life skill.

Mike Capuzzi: Yeah, absolutely.

Philip Blackett: So it's helpful back then, but even more so now, not just because it's a life skill, but because the environment has drastically changed from what it was 1520 years ago. And you have a new generation of people growing up thinking that this is the way you just function. You know, you're supposed to cancel one on another. You were supposed to curse people out in the comment section. You're supposed to swipe left. If somebody has a different point of view of yours, or you're supposed to, God forbid, take matters into your own hands violently. If you're in public with somebody that has a different shirt on than you.

Mike Capuzzi: Do, you know, when you were sharing that, it almost seems like this book or a version of this, but probably a version. Like, it would probably be pretty challenging. But you could see a book like this written. A kid's version. Right? I don't know if this has been something on your. Is it something in your future or your vision?

Philip Blackett: Listen, I had to come up with a prototype first. And now I guess, like, a leading question would be like, who are the right publishers I should look into? Because to write the book itself was a good deal. But to your point, I think I know where you're going at it. I definitely have thought about different editions, whether it's like kids, like elementary school or teenagers, adolescents or college students, married couples, generational differences, like grandparents to grandkids, that sort of thing in the workplace. And you can even go political as well. How do you deal with people who. Who believe differently as far as religion?

Mike Capuzzi: Yep.

Philip Blackett: So there's a number of different ways to slice this up. Right?

Mike Capuzzi: Okay. I'm sorry.

Philip Blackett: No, there's a number of different ways to slice this up. I just knew that. Okay, I gotta start with something. And then from there, if there's enough demand for it and I found the right, you know, partner with it, I'd be more than happy to explore those different type of additions. Because like I said before, this is not a book that should be seen as a every two or four year type of book to read. This is an everyday book. Because this is dealing with a life skill that all of us have to form at some point in time that deals with all of our interpersonal relationships. Because I can guarantee you one thing, Mike.

Philip Blackett: In particular. If you and I hung out for a weekend together, actually, I can guarantee you two things will happen. One, in the course of conversation, you and I will find some things that we absolutely agree on to the point that we feel like we're absolute blood brothers. The other thing I can guarantee you on is that we'll probably find a thing or two, at least, that we seem on polar opposites. On that we could be further away from each other, but yet. And still, we can still be friends. We can still work together in the midst of disagreement. And I think at that point, what it says is that there's no way we can hide from it.

Philip Blackett: There's no way we can shield ourselves from people that think differently. It's almost as silly as saying, I can't work with anyone unless they look like me. It's not the real world. So once we realize the truth about that, let's figure out how do we prepare ourselves to navigate what the real world is.

Mike Capuzzi: First of all, I think just being completely objective with what you have here, Philip and I've done a lot over the years and worked with tons of authors and business owners, etcetera, but disagree without disrespect is a brand to me. Like, that is a brand that you own. You may want to think about protecting it intellectually, copyright, trademark, whatever, but if it's available. But, like, that is a brand. And to your point, are you familiar? There's a gentleman named Hal Elrod. He wrote the book Miracle Mornings, I think it was. First book. Miracle mornings, I think it was called.

Mike Capuzzi: Okay, so it's about waking up early, essentially, and, you know, getting the day started right, etcetera. But he built in it. So millionaire.

Philip Blackett: Yeah.

Mike Capuzzi: What did I say? Miracle Mornings.

Philip Blackett: Miracle Morning. Yep.

Mike Capuzzi: That was the brand. He had such success with that he then quickly created different editions. Miracle mornings for college students, miracle mornings for busy, you know, and he had. You can go on Amazon and see it. All right. I think it's. Yeah, it's Hal Elrod. E l r o d.

Mike Capuzzi: I have a couple of versions I gave my daughters when they were in college. The college version. But you have something there. I would highly encourage you, Philip, to really keep that in mind. I'm not saying you need to go do it tomorrow, but it's a very impactful brand, in my opinion. It can be layered, cut up different ways for couples, for business owners, the different kids getting that into schools. There are publishers that are very good at doing that, getting those kind of books in schools and colleges and secondary ed.

Mike Capuzzi: So I love it. I think without even knowing the framework, which I want to talk about here and get some ideas from you, but I think I would definitely encourage you.

Philip Blackett: Yeah, absolutely. Thank you. I'll definitely follow up on it.

Mike Capuzzi: But again, you're a student, so there's research involved. There may be somebody, a couple people I can point you to afterwards. But regardless, I think you really have something there. It's very timely. We were recording this in August of 2024. It'll probably air in early September 24. There's an election coming up in our future here in the States. If somebody is listening to this, hasn't read your book yet, but they have some challenging relationships or whatever it might be.

Mike Capuzzi: Philip, what would be a tip or two that you would, you know, how would you encourage those people? Yeah.

Philip Blackett: So I think the first thing I would say for that person is, listen, you're probably going to come across people that are very much intertwined with what they believe, and it's not a bad thing. Let's just start there. Right. It's not a bad thing to be very much a strong advocate for a particular idea, belief, or candidate. With that being said, you want to be able to debate the idea or belief or candidate per se, and separate that from the identity of the believer. If you're able to share with somebody that, hey, I just want to talk about this person or this policy or this idea and me being against it or having reservations about it, I just want to be clear that that's not reservations or critique on you as a person. It's more so as far as what you believe. Because if you do something like that, Mike, I would imagine it helps disarm people.

Philip Blackett: They already understand that there's likely going to be disagreement, but you have somebody that cares about them enough to say, hey, listen, I just want to preface this by saying, if I disagree with it, I don't want you to think of it as I disagree with you. Because another thing I would advocate for somebody is really communicate, almost to the point of over communication, that two things can be true at the same time. I can disagree with your belief, and I can still respect and love you as a person, as a friend, as a son, as a colleague, as a neighbor, as a spouse. So if you did that, what it does is it sets the setting in a place where you can actually debate the issue more so based on its merit without, again, personal and hopefully, in the course of doing that, by listening to the other person, getting a sense of where they're coming from, why believe, why they vote the way they vote, and just have a conversation where you're trying to share information with one another and just learn, yeah, there might be some persuasion involved with it. Maybe you might want that person to be on your side, too. But more than likely, what I found out, Mike, it's not necessarily what I say that usually convinces or persuades somebody. It's how I go about it in a way that's respectful, that is understanding, that is loving, and somebody that says, listen, even if we disagree at the end of this, you're still my friend, I still would love to hang out with you. I still want to work with you, and we can still continue this conversation because I'll keep the door open where we can talk about it more, because I believe that our relationship is more important then whether or not I'm right or I'm wrong.

Mike Capuzzi: When people exhibit behavior that is so counter to your own fundamental belief system or even just truly obvious what's in front of you, what's your advice there?

Philip Blackett: So it's a great question, Mike.

Mike Capuzzi: Did I articulate a question?

Philip Blackett: Oh, yeah, of course. Because I get that question a lot. It's like, how about it? What if somebody just said something that's really stupid? Well, essentially, you thought it was stupid. But here's the interesting part. That person you're talking about, he or she doesn't think it's stupid. So here's what's curious about it, right? What's curious to me, we got to develop this curiosity. Understand, okay? That person thinks about this enough to say, hey, this really makes sense. Which would mean if it's in contrast to what you believe, they probably think that what you think is really stupid.

Philip Blackett: So there's an interesting exercise, essentially, to kind of share. Okay, tell me why you think this makes sense, and I'll share with you why I think what I think makes sense. And I'm not going about it in the sense of trying to persuade you. I'm just curious. I just want to learn to. Because here's the thing that I learned. You never want to give up on people, Mike, because I don't care what the topic is or idea. I'm pretty sure I can almost guarantee you that person did not come out of their mother's womb thinking that from the jump, everything that we are ascribing to we're believing in, we had learned it at some point and we didn't know of it before.

Philip Blackett: And what that means is that if we learned it, we can also unlearn it. If we can advocate for it, we can actually go away from it. So, to me, it's almost, in a sense, that to some degree, every idea or belief, to some degree is negotiable. But what's more important is, if that's the case, how do we approach people that think differently, more so from a curiosity standpoint, just to learn? And then over the course of time, you may come across people that might see the error in their ways. They see the light. Oh, my gosh, Mike, thanks for enlightening me. If you had, if you had unfriended me the moment I said this, then we never would have had this conversation to begin with. But you did something that the vast majority of people don't do.

Philip Blackett: You actually picked up the phone and called me, or you actually, like, had a face to face conversation with me over lunch about it. Most people, they're so content on just firing off on their thumbs, text messaging, comments on Instagram and that sort tell me all that you believe, and then I'll pick at each one of them and tell you why you're wrong. But you won't get into actual conversation, because one of the big things we know as communicators is there's so little in communication based off words alone. When you're not on the phone with them, they don't hear your voice. They don't hear the tonality. Tonality adds a lot of context to the words you speak. But even more so, Mike, if I don't talk to you in person like I'm doing now through Zoom, for example, you don't see my body language, which is arguably the most important and significant factor of communication to begin with. If you don't see my eyes, you don't see my hand motions, you don't see my smile, you don't really get a gauge as far as where I'm actually going about this.

Philip Blackett: In addition to the tonality, in addition to the actual words. So what I would argue too respectfully, there's so much of communication that's lost by what people think they're doing when they are, quote, unquote, debating online.

Mike Capuzzi: And that goes to your point 15 minutes ago. Right. Of what's changed in the last 20 years, for example, because it was probably right, probably 2025 years ago where the phone became the thing. Right. And you didn't have the keyboard warriors and the know bashing people that you don't even know. It was, everything was face to face. And yes, it's a lot different. Even what we're doing right now is still not the same as if you and I were, you know, you know, in Florida having some barbecue and some beer.

Mike Capuzzi: Right. Yeah. So it, it's a challenge, Philip. I mean, and, you know, you're, oh, my gosh, you're little, you're little girls, and this is what they're growing up in. And I know you're going to, you know, have a nice fortress around them, but still, it's just like, geez Louise, it's, you know, it would be just, I just wish, you know, there wasn't that dependency on this thing and this, this thing wasn't the thing that becomes another appendage.

Philip Blackett: But that, I digress again, that that's why I feel like my work is cut out for me on this book, this is a ongoing, this won't, this won't end November 6, 2024. I can guarantee you this is an ongoing thing for the rest of my life.

Mike Capuzzi: And this skill sets required like this, people need to, like, to your point, like this is the skill sets that you could teach. There's so much you could do with this, depending on how far you want to take this. And again, I applaud you on, you know, at least getting started. So I'm checking the clock. It's like, wow, we have to wrap up here, but we're just getting started. I know. I don't, I don't have a Joe Rogan three hour conversation. We've had some, we've had, we've had some, we've had Florida weather up here recently.

Mike Capuzzi: And I try to get out, walk every day with my wife, and it's been so hot and humid. I've been on the treadmill and I've been watching. I've got, it takes me like a week to go through one single Joe Rogan episode, but they're good. And I like the long format, but I just, wow. Anyway, well, listen again, multi book author, you know something about what it means to be a book author. Philip, I'd love to hear your, your version of the author Factor, about what the impact, whether it's on yourself, on your readers, whatever it might be. What has it meant to you to be a published book author?

Philip Blackett: Yeah. So I think it's a great question to be a published book. Authorization means a couple of things. One, it's the exercise of being able to get your thoughts on paper is quite an exercise in itself because you have to stand by what you say, and it's without question what you said because it's on paper. So you need to make sure you pretty much are pretty confident what you stand for behind what you write. And the other part of it, too, is it's a great way for people to hear about your message, whether you're here or not, meaning it's something that can be teaching to somebody, whether you're in person in front of them or not, or if it's 100 years from now or not. And so there's something about being on the written page that can transcend your own lifetime in your own region or location. But at the same time, when it comes to being a book author, I think it really does get to the point of leaving some sort of gift to the world around you.

Philip Blackett: Because if you never voice what's on your mind and put it on paper, the world will never get a sense of who you are, what you have to share, and how you can benefit them.

Mike Capuzzi: So, Philip, how can my listeners learn more about you? Where's the best place to get your book?

Philip Blackett: Absolutely. So to get my book, disagree without disrespect. How to respectfully debate with those who think, believe, and vote differently from you. It is on Amazon. I haven't gotten the trademark yet for disagree without disrespect, but I do have the.com at least. So you can go to disagreewithoutdisrespect.com. you can also connect with me on my website, phillipblacket.com or look me up on social media, and we can follow each other there.

Philip Blackett: I'll be on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube. Just look up my name, Philip Blackett.

Mike Capuzzi: Well, Philip, I do enjoy meeting you, and I think you've got some important work ahead of you, so I appreciate your time today.

Philip Blackett: Thank you so much for the opportunity, Mike. I appreciate it as well.